Hipchick's Home

It’s a new year! Lots has happened over the last year … some good, some bad. I decided that I really needed to get back to writing – not only is it cathartic, but it helps me remember. I am glad that I never did any drugs when I was younger. My memory is freaking shot … drugs would have only made things much, much worse.

Anyway … Let’s see …

I finally got a Kindle and I love it. Between audio books and the Kindle, I’ll likely read more than my “normal”40-60 books a year. I feel really good knowing that I am not getting another 60 books of paper to find a home for in the library, which is rather full.

In the pet department, my little Mischief passed away on Dec. 23, 2008 .. sad, but the frisky lil old girl’s time was up. Snagglepuss, Quigley and Sultan, along with the ever-impressive Dakota are all fine. My goofy lil boys

Anyway .. I’ll do some more catch up over the next few and see what sort of semi-interesting things happen around here.

Ciao!!

Home safe and sound … and cold

I had a wonderful time and wish I could have stayed longer … like permanently. I think as long as I could have a solid, strong, internet connection and cell service, I would live on the islands. Hurricanes and all

It’s funny …  I am so connected, entranced by water. I have water flowing in every room of my house. The obvious places – kitchen & bathroom – have running water, but the rest of the house has it’s own water calming effects. My office has an aquarium, as does the living room. My office also has a small water fountain which I take great delight in watching the marble roll incessantly around on. The master bedroom also has a wall fountain, which often is scented with lavender oil. The front room with the pool table (the one the my office is off of) has a small fountain bubbler. The guestroom has a small tabletop fountain and a betta in a small, fluted vase.  Even the library has bamboo in a water scape.

OK … that’s not the funny part. The funny part is that if you’re into the zodiac sign stuff, then as a Sagittarius, me Zodiac element is fire, not water. I do have a fascination of fire, often have candles burning, love to make fires and such .. but have no compulsion to have fires burning 24/7 around the house. Again, I digress…

There is something so relaxing about the sound of the surf. Something sensual about sitting on the beach and letting the surf ebb and flow over your body. Something carefree about the warm breeze kissing your body. Something breathtaking ab0ut watching the sun rise on the horizon.

I slept like a baby … as I often do when in a non-home bed. Don’t know if I snored … I was alone. But I got 8 hours of sleep after my late night dip in the ocean. No sore back, no sore neck, no tension … ahhhh.

MiM was right … he said, “Yes. I need you to go out and have fun. ”    He was so right (as usual).

So a bit more about words … it’s not like I haven’t talked enough about them recently. LOL

It makes me laugh when I watch commercials on TV that tell you that it’s bad to say hate, or “that’s gay” … Don’t get me wrong, it isn’t healthy for your karma and balance to say such things, h0wever it is your choice, your freedom of speech that allows you to say those words. Why should I let some big, gazillion dollar a year business tell ME what I can say?!? It infuriates me. Only I can choose the words that I speak, type, write!

Eons ago when the PMRC was marching on Washington about rating music, I would get so boiled. Who’s going to censor my music for me? No one! Of course nowadays, music with one curse word, video games with alcohol use … they all get a rating. Look at how far we have sunk. But I digress …

At the height of the PMRC’s crap, I remember thinking (and still feel the same today) that artists should be a bit more responsible with their content. They know of their impact to society and should keep that in mind … a self-censoring chip, so to say. I also belive that parents need to grow up and do their job. As a parent, you cannot be your child’s friend, you need to be their parent. There are so many parents out there who have the same mentality as a college student … they want to act like they were 21 years old, and have no responsibilities. Wake up, my friend … once you have a child, your fun, free life pass has been revoked.

What does that all mean? It means you as a parent need to stepup to the plate and be a parent. Watch what your kids do online, listen to what they listen to, watch what they watch … before they have it in their hands. My parents never censored my books or music, however any rated R movie was watched by them before I could see it. Violent movies were fine (i.i. action movies, like Chuck Norris) … but any movies that were sexually charged, were definite no-no’s. I was already headstrong and smart … they really didn’t need to add sexual prowness to the resume.

Back to words … although freedom of speech isn’t  free anymore (just ask Don Imus or Howard Stern), you choose the words you speak. You choose what emotion to evoke from someone. You choose how to say something. And you can also self-censor.

I need to find a safe outlet. In general, I’m pretty easygoing but today was simply stressful for me. MED has been having some weird feeling in his chest. Said it felt like his heart was skipping beats and beating abnormally. Considering his family has heart issues, I thought it might be in his bet interest to go to the doctor’s. So, I rolled out of bed after about 30 minutes of sleep.

The entire ride up I could sense the blood pressure getting higher, the heart rate racing … I know he was scared. Putting on my best smile, my calmest exterior, I drove him up to the city. Prepared, I brought a book, my Zune (which I never drive without) and headphones. While I waited, I saw many folks go in and come back out. What was taking them so long?!? Then I see the receptionist virtually in tears talking on the phone saying, “It doens’t look good.”

WTF?!?  OK … calm … breathe. I put my book away, I turned off the Zune and cased the headphones. Breathe…

As it turns out, she’s talking to a family member about personal stuff … but I’m worried. Ten minutes later he comes out. Seems that folks who work out a lot get this weird feeling, although it wouldn’t happen when he was hooked up to the EKG. Driving home, he still isn’t super thrilled, but is a bit relieved. Now, my armor starts cracking … but not enough for him to see. I’m shifting, grabbing the wheel, driving quite aggressively.

Once I get home, I head into my office and really try to settle in. I’ve been so unfocused lately … I’m seriously thinking there are a lot of hormones and nasty chems in my body going AWOL. I even have difficulty focusing on MiM work. It is at this point that I realize that my hands are shaking. OK … now I’m finally reacting.

After it passes, I’m still quite unfocused but plowing through RTS and the daily workload. I’ve really got to find some new clients. MiM has referred me to three leads, but it hasn’t gone anywhere. RaKL has referred me to one, also with the same results … and he’s been a bit weird these days. But that is another story for another time.

The afternoon passes and I decide to do some laundry. Of course I’m checking all pockets because someone is notorious for leaving money in pockets, which the washing machine & dryer don’t appreciate. I make a general announcement to the house, “Ooooh, paper money.”

Out of nowhere, I’ve got a hands in my jeans’ pockets digging. No, no, no! I start laughing and running away. Not that I got too far! Plunk … now I’m rolling around on the floor and trying sooooo hard to breathe, but I can’t because I’m laughing to freaking hard. To compensate, I shove my right hand into the right pocket, roll over on it and try to wigggle away. Now he thinks that’s where the money’s at. Of course at the end of the day, there was never any money, just paper receipts that I pulled out, but he didn’t know that

It felt so good to laugh that hard … I can’t even remember the last time I laughed that hard. Definitely a good stress reliever.

Ciao!!

For those of you from my Haven days and those of you who follow me across this crazy blog world, you know that I talk about my sign … the one that reads “Will listen and give sound, practical advice.”

With broad brush strokes, I try to fulfill a void in someone’s life. I listen, I ask, I listen, I question, I probe, I listen. This is essential in getting to know someone, to fill their needs, to find out what makes them tick, what their desires and passions are, how they talk and like being talked to. When I was younger, I just assumed that my natural curiosities were normal. I always asked a lot of questions, simply because I love to hear a good story. It’s why, at a young age, I got along so well with those who were older.

Now that I’m older, I find it oddly strange that there is a significant lack of good conversationalists in the world. It could be the circles I travel in, the pets that I keep, the technology of the day … but I also believe that our educational system is dumbing down people. It exists only for mediocrity, not for building an intelligent future for our country. While chatting with someone 10 years older than me last night, it was truly, thoroughly and completely enjoyable to talk about topics of relevance, instead of smut talk.

At the end of the conversation the invisible neon sign was flashing … Will Listen and Give Sound, Practical Advise.

Then he asked me to turn the webcam on …

I’m sitting here having a cup of coffee trying to figure out the best way to accept a friend who goes back to their cheating, wife beating husband. I think I put on a good facce, but if I have to drive back here next week, I won’t be thrilled.

He was there when we rolled in. He didn’t think I wouldn’t bring her and not come in, did he? Made myself quite handy in the kitchen by making coffee, while never taking my eyes off of him. Even she said that it was disconcerning. I swear to God … if I had enough strength, I would have tried to rip his britches off and shove my combat boot so far up his ass that I’d need to forego the boots.

She’ll be OK … she just has to be strong. And I’ll be there for her if she needs me.

As far as PNAF .. we did end up connecting. He is luscious … answered the door naked and saluting. Not exactly what I had envisioned as a welcome. Once I got over that, it was all good. I love his inhibition and sense of freedom. Most of us female RTS’ers know about his extensive package … I just wasn’t expecting to see it on a friendly ‘I’m in the area’ visit. At the end of the day, though … it’s all good.

I’m about to hit the road and finally go home

Sigh …

So I had a fit a fidgets today and decided to go for a drive, after some coaxing from a friend in need. Driving with cool tunes is good, right? Drive to NY … cruise … drive … shift … vroom …..

I have a friend down here … caught her hubby in bed with a chick. He recently retired from the military and when she got pissed over him knocking boots with a 20 year old, he hit her. It took her years before she left her first husband who abused her. I was there the last time, got the knife scar to prove it. I admit, I was a bit shocked how quickly she remarried, but I also gave her my word, my solemn vow, that if she ever needed me, I would be there. I would hop a plane, get in a car … whatever it took, I would be there for her. Admittedly, I wasn’t thrilled to get the call, but within 20 minutes, I was on the road.

Digression: How can a man hit a woman? I understand that we tend to push buttons, it’s our nature. But how could you marr the face of the person who loves you and is committed to you? Ladies, how can you return to this man, time and time again?  I just don’t understand … and probably never will.

I have never thought I was intimidating.. At 5′3″ … how can one be intimidating?!? Interestingly, this man was intimidated by me. He knew I was there with the ex … and today, I wasn’t afraid to get in my car, drive here and confront him, while comforting her. He’s at a friend’s place tonight and I’m stuck in a freezing rain storm and it isn’t safe to drive home tonight. We’re staying in this hotel tonight .. mostly to just get out of the house.  Nice super comfy bed

She’s so beautiful … long straight red hair, porcelain skin and inquisitive green eyes. I wish I could give her one of my happiest days and let her experience true, unbridled happiness for just one day. It would change her life, her outlook, her soul. I think she’s finally all cried out … and isn’t super stellar looking right now. But as she lays here next to me, I can hear her breathing … calm, peaceful, relaxed. It’s totally worth it to be here right now. I know this is going to be a good night’s sleep for her and that makes me incredibly happy. I promised SCJK that I would not influence her decisions and put myself in harm’s way, so when she wakes up, I’ll support whatever her decision is – to come home to VT with me or to go back to him.

I hope she comes home with me.

On the flip side, I’m near PNAF and he doesn’t want to come out and play and that bothers me. I put myself out on a limb and he cut the branch. Sigh …

Well .. I’ll know know about my trek back home tomorrow …

As a human, we are all unique. The non-conformist so completely embedded in me despises anyone who wants to be classified, stereotyped, or profiled. Can’t you think for yourself? Can’t you make an educated decision? Don’t you want to revel in your uniqueness? Don’t you want everyone to see how special you are?

Growing up, I always wanted to be different. I never wanted to fit in. I always pushed the envelope and still do to this day. Somedays, I really do wish I could keep things a bit more controlled, but that is a goal yet to be achieved. Yet.

While coming the web for new blogs to read and keep my brain stimulated … I am quite surprised at the number of people who wail, “I just want to be like everyone else.” Grrrr!

Celebrate your individuality, celebrate your uniqueness … never conform to the standards that someone else has chosen for you.

Be a good person, take the high road … and be unique.

Happy Thanksgiving!

In keeping with the tradition of the holiday, here’s my list of what I am thankful for:

• Being alive and healthy
• Having a family that drives me crazy, nuts and is always there for me when I need them
• Having friends who are brutally honest, caring and open
• Having a (relatively) warm house to live in
• All the possessions I need and want
• That I can work for some of the most interesting, intriguing, intelligent people and keep them on track

Live for today, live for the now, live for the moment … simply live

As most of you know, I don’t sleep much. Normally this isn’t a big deal … it’s just that I wish I could. Like taking your contacts out for the night, I wish I could pop out my brain and sleep for 8 glorious hours … uninterrupted. No waking up with my heart pounding like I was having a bad dream. No waking up every 6.7 minutes (as my PSG indicates). Just sleep. What a wonderful world this would be.

Looking at the clock here on my laptop, it’s 8:00 in the morning. After chatting with DZCW, then PNAF, then SLME … it’s now 8:00a. Sigh …

I know I often kid around saying things like, “I’ll sleep when I die.” Facts are … this is slowly killing me, like smoking or alcohol abuse. One of my herbalist friends has recommended a lifestyle change and I may take her up on the offer to coach me through it. She specifically mentioned however, that a nighttime soak in the tub is not in the cards … hence my knee-jerking reflex to scream out “No, no, no!”

In the health arena, I did manage to put some weight back on while in Vegas, but the ravenous appetite cravings have stopped. Now I just need to find … no, make … time to get out and do more stuff. Yoga would be nice again, and everyone knows I’d like to be more limber for other fun activities I have always despised running & biking, and considering I live in VT, that isn’t in the cards for wintertime. Well … who knows …

Time to get up and get going … and hope for a good night’s sleep tonight.